Thistle what's on your mind?
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I believe that most trolls are sad people, living their lonely lives vicariously through those they see as strong and successful.
Do not post animated .gifs on my wall please!
I know you can appreciate this. At one time or another, my mother made some of those exact statements. Brings back memories:)
I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
I just finished cleaning.'
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you
into the middle of next week!'
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
'Because I said so, that's why.'
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
you're not going to the store with me.'
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
'Make sure you wear clean underwear,
in case you're in an accident.'
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
'If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
'Stop acting like your father!'
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world
who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
'Just wait until we get home.'
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
'You are going to get it when you get home!'
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going
to get stuck that way.'
19. My mother taught me ESP.
'Put your sweater on; don't you think
I know when you are cold?'
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
don't come running to me.'
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
'If you don't eat your vegetables,
you'll never grow up.'
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
'You're just like your father.'
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think
you were born in a barn?'
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope
they turn out just like you!'
The wife's back on the warpath again.
Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest
we should hold auditions for her part.
My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.
I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she
likes to call it.
After both suffering from depression for awhile, the wife and I were going to
commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I
started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on!
I woke up this morning at 8 and just felt that something was wrong. I got
downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I
panicked. I didn't know what to do. Then I remembered McDonald's serves
breakfast until 11:30.
The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her,
"Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"
My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!" "Oh," I
replied, "so now you want me to stay!"
I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like
she's moving during sex.
hey thistle, dropping by with the monthly kudos train, dropped off your +5
Thanks for pointing me in the right direction.
Would have given you +k but i allready did that this month
Have a great day.
A volcano that has been dormant for nearly 50 years has erupted not once, but twice in the same day in Chile.The first eruption shot a thick pillar of smoke and ashes into the air, nearly 7 kilometers high! The area, which is luckily not very densely populated, was evacuated and a state of emergency has been declared. There is even a curfew currently in effect and the military has been sent in help.
Thistle Bee The One by muttleymcg (photograph)
Soon the bees will be buzzing in the warmth of Spring with promises of Summer to come. Glad it's warming up for you Thistle
Some kudos your way.
The Monarch gives the best kudos 5 at a time.
Good street-view pictures of places you've seen, or places you'd like to see.
Enter an address, then click Route button, and "drive" using your mouse on the streets. Play around with the mouse to see what you can do (turn around, look up and down, etc.)
Live street view and virtual driving is available at
5 kudos.I missed you guys.My mind and memorys are not what they used to be Thistle.I watched a movie tonite and commented on it.Then I saw a better comment i wrote for it 5 months ago and i have hardly no memory of it.Hahaha.Wow.I remember you and Mags.Movielover,Karloff-SHOT!-misterjay,treeofwoe,robophone,ad so many others.This site is good for me.It's bringing back a lot of things thru the haze.I think I remember the important rules.No Politics,No religion and No drug talk.Thistle.I have to relearn stuff on the internet.I don't remember how to wallpost here and that sucks Bigtime.I tried to use google image and couldnt even figure it out.Still tho even tho i am a big dummy now,I,at least found my way back here.Nothing beats primewire.It's helpful soul food for my depleted Brain.Now that i'm back,I,am doing my Snoopy dance.Wish You could see me doing it.I know it would make you happy and smile.Lmao.If I could just wallpost-I'd send You a beautifal 3-D flower,Like i used to.*Hugs*
happy easter thistle. hope you got loads of chocolate
Have a wonderful Easter and a great week!
A day for counting our blessings.
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