Thistle what's on your mind?
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I believe that most trolls are sad people, living their lonely lives vicariously through those they see as strong and successful.
Do not post animated .gifs on my wall please!
Why Teachers Continue to Drink Heavily
The following questions were in last year's GED examination (These are genuine answers):
Q. What is a turbine?
A.. Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head. Once an Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head. (I love this one!)
Q. How is dew formed?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
Q. What are steroids?
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
(Shoot yourself now , there is little hope)
Q. What happens to your body as you age?
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (So true)
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A. Premature death.
Q. What is artificial insemination?
A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?
A. Keep it in the cow. (Simple, but brilliant)
Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)?
A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U (WT?)
Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie.
Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
Q. What is the most common form of birth control?
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
(That would work)
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome .
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)
Q. What is a terminal illness?
A. When you are sick at the airport. (Irrefutable)
Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight (brilliant)
Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
A guy wanted to buy a gift for his new girl friend's birthday, and as they had only started dating, after careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note: personal, but not too personal.
Accompanied by the girl friend's younger sister, he went to Macy's and bought a pair of white gloves. The sister purchased a pair of panties for herself.
During the wrapping, however, the clerk got the items mixed up, and the sister got the gloves and the girl friend got the panties.
Unaware of this, the guy sent the package to the girl friend with the following note:
I chose these because I noticed you are not in the habit of wearing any in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long ones with the buttons, but she wears the short ones that are easier to remove. These are a delicate shade, but the sales clerk that helped me has a pair that she has been wearing for the past three weeks and they are hardly soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart. I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt other hands will come into contact with them before I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing. Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for me Friday night.
All my love.
p.s. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur showing.
Kudos for you.
Today has been one of those days I'd rather not talk about.
I am fervently hoping the rest of this week will be great for all of us.
There were other whites in this grouping but just before the photographer arrived, they had to see a man about a mouse....lol
+karma have a great week I hope you like this post
Are they twins?
LMAO now thass cold!!!
Classic Oldie---Lie Detector
A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie.
He decides to test it out at dinner one night.
The father asks his son what he did that afternoon.
The son says, "I did some schoolwork."
The robot slaps the son.
The son says, "Ok, Ok. I was at a friend's house watching movies."
Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"
Son says, "Toy Story."
The robot slaps the son again.
Son says, "Ok, Ok, we were watching porn."
Dad says, "What?" At your age I didn't even know what porn was."
The robot slaps the father.
Mom laughs and says, "Well, he certainly is your son."
The robot slaps the mother.
Robot For Sale.....
He said, She said
He said to her, "I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it."
She said to him, "You wear pants don't you?"
He said to her, "Shall we try swapping positions tonight?"
She said to him, "That's a good idea - you stand by the stove and sink while I sit on the sofa and fart."
He said to her, "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
"She said to him, "Turn sideways and look in the mirror!"
He said to her, "Why don't women blink during foreplay?"
She said to him, "They don't have time."
He said to her, "How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?"
She said to him, "I don't know; it has never happened."
He said to her, "Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
She said to him, "They already have boyfriends."
He said to her, "What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?"
She said to him, "A widow."
He said to her, "Why are married women heavier than single women?"
She said to him, "Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge."
hi there! i have now been her A full 4 years! and i wanted to send you a thank you! you mods keep this site running and thus make it possible to stay here
Thanks for that link thistle ! I seen a few episodes of home fires but I didn't think it was very good . Not seen Arthur & George though. What are we going to do when downtown ends ?! Nothing is as good as that !
5 + Thistle-Thanks for sparing a guiding light to lead my Way.When i get my dental implants and the 50/50 operation n my achillies heel,rather i will walk or limp,I,am going to begin a quest to find my future Queen.A woman who is not afraid to wear the pants or watch spooky movies with me.I hope when i find her,She shares the qualitys of being Strong,Wise,Caring,andCompassionate as You,Thistle,and Mags are.I may never have met you two in person but i care for you and over 5 years now,You,both have been Solid by me.You Ladys are the Greatest.primewire wouldn't feel as Homely without You,the other admins,or my friends here.It's more than movies and tv shows and thats what sets this site above others.Primewire has No Equal.Peace-
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